Another Manic Friday.

Some might be sleeping. Some might be playing their X-box 360. Some might be having sex at this very moment. Some might be throwing flour n eggs at their loved ones. Some might be studying (shud be me but im not). Some might be watching discovery channel and sipping on tuborg. And some. . .might be stressed out by some psychotic asshole which called to mess up their mind. That is me. well, im not the psychotic asshole. im the victim. Never in my life, have i encountered such a psycopath which doesnt get what im tryna say. Never in my life either had i encountered such a BIG headed , world-best manipulator. And never in my entire life have i encountered such a mind-messer which i had fallen for in the beginning. And yes, Mr Z called me last nite and caused sooo much pain n sickness in me, i swear i cud feel my heart beating soo fast it almost went out of its conformation. I feeeeel sooo mad at him i almost regret even knowing him. but i dont. he's a nice guy n deserves someone like him. "ill wait until u finish ur exam, n by then, i wud like to hear an answer from u like you've promised". And so, i have less than 10 days to make up my mind whether i shud work out our relationship or just move on seperately. i know the answer SHUD BE that i just walk off. like Christina Aguilera did tru her song , 'walk away'. . i sing that song everysingle day n i totally get it. I mean, farah, dont torture urself. eventho ill be the bitchiest bitch n feel soo guilty for the rest of my life. if uve read my recent blogs, i was explaining on how im the type who cant say NO. im toooo kind to see other people sedih or watever. But this time is diff...i feel like i cannot take it anymore. even if we get back together..it will NEVER b the same.. he has to face the fact, i have to face the fact, that this thing will always come between us in the future. And soo...i guess i dont need another 10 days..i can make that desicion right naw.. I dont think ill be easily swept away after this by any guy..because what Z has done for me..i think nobody can ever do it better than him.. such a shame both of us are crazy big headed people who cant loose in any situation =P... seriously..ARIES VS. SCORPIO = madness+destruction+WAR. i just feel n think that we arent actually compatible enuf to not kill each other. hehe..omgawd Z...ill miss u sooo much u have no idea..i love u..but it has to stop right here, right naw.. im not the tunduk-tunduk material kind of girl. im bossy in my own way..we just arent meant for each other ya noe? if only u wud understand what im tryna say..sigh~..i have a test in less than 4 hours n im typing away writing this blog. how can i think anymore when he has messed up my mind. thanks a bunch Z, woo woo! i appreciate ur last effort in making me insane. good job. To those who have psycopath partners, my advice is, if u can accept them n dont turn crazy by the 50th time u guys have a major fight, then i suggest u keep loving them n cherish them..dont ever let them go because if u can go tru that..it must be REAL TRUE LOVE that is anchoring ur bond together. =) i wish my time will come soon. hey im still young. 21 is like zero in a way. hehe. Maybe ill print this blog out n leave it on his door steps. it cud be the last love letter ill ever write to you Z. =( I love u and i miss u..i wish u all the best in life..u are sooo kind to me n ive never had the slightest intention to make u even think that i was fooling around all this while. When u find someone new, u will realise that i was just  a harbor that u stopped by to gain experience n share a little joy n pain. ur true destination will come soon ur way. Just keep believing in urself like u always do. I might not be there for u anymore. but im still here. alive. n my iphone is never out of my sight. Drop ur ego sometimes n gimme a call aite psycopath ? =)

your tomel, your pembuli, your merajok machine, your gadoh buddy, your moral supporter, your everything. . .
FSZ.